User blog:NerdWithAKeyboard/Movies I Hate That Everyone Else Likes
WARNING: THE FOLLOWING BLOG CONTAINS OPINIONS. IF YOU ARE OFFENDED BY OPINIONS OR DO NOT BELIEVE PEOPLE ARE ENTITLED TO THEIR OWN, DO NOT CONTINUE READING, THEN PLEASE GO RETURN TO THE UNIVERSE THAT REVOLVES AROUND YOU. (that is a joke) See also: Movies I Like That Everyone Else Hates. '' '' (1987) God, I hate this movie. I hated it when I first saw it as a kid, and I hate it now. I usually love weird, surreal fantasies like Alice in Wonderland and Wishbringer and stuff like that, but this movie was so weird and made no goddamn sense. I usually enjoy dark movies, especially ones aimed towards kids, as I believe kids need a little bit of dark and scary to help teach them that life can be rough, but there is always something good to it. But this film is WAY too dark for kids, at least in my opinion, with some WAY too scary and disturbing content. Both the heroes and villains in this movie are so insufferably unlikable, and I just couldn't wait for The NeverEnding Story to end. In all fairness, however, at least the effects and atmosphere are okay. And the sequels got the proper reaction that they deserved. '' '' (2008) I love Disney, and I don't mind it when they do something aimed towards younger kids as opposed to all ages. I also don't mind when they cater to a certain gender/interest, it's just how movies are going to work. I don't dislike Tinker Bell for being aimed towards younger kids or that fact that I'm a man and it's a more girl-oriented movie. I dislike Tinker Bell because it's boring. Incredibly, incredibly boring. I first watched this movie as a kid, and I walked out. Again, it didn't do anything too insulting (except one thing, I'll get to it), it was just so slow and boring. I actually fell asleep during parts of this movie. However, my main issue other than it being boring is Tinker Bell herself. Tinker Bell was always a unique female character in Disney because she wasn't pure good. If anything, she was kind of a villain at times in the original Peter Pan; trying to kill Wendy, allying with Hook and revealing Peter's hideout, and being a general bitch, but ultimately returning to good. However, this movie COMPLETELY does away with that and makes her just another generic nice, sweetheart of a character. There's nothing wrong with characters like that, but Tinker Bell just isn't one of those characters. Who would have thought that the version with no dialogue would have so much more personality than the one with not only speech, but a whole movie centered around her? With all that said, however, the animation is generally pretty good for straight to DVD and some of the comedic moments and comic relief characters can actually be pretty funny at times. I also can't judge the sequels, as I never saw them. '' '' (2012) Anyone that knows me knows that is my all-time favorite movie. To review it would be redundant, and I could totally go off topic talking about how much I adore it. But long story short, I love The Dark Knight, as well as . That put a lot of pressure on the third film to be even better. To make another long story short, it wasn't. The few times I've seen this movie, I forget almost everything about it almost every time. Why is it that the movie where Gotham literally falls to ruin and is under the threat of nuclear strike so much less memorable than the one with the Joker? One of my main issues is actually Bane. A lot of people love this take on the character and Tom Hardy's performance. I don't. When I think Bane, I think of the one from the comics; freakishly huge, but brilliant and calculating. This Bane definitely got the intelligence down, but they really downplayed his strength. Also, why is he British and not Hispanic? I also didn't care much for the subplot about Wayne in the prison, didn't like the surprise villain, and especially didn't like the ending. This movie just seemed to loose me; Batman Begins and The Dark Knight were superhero movies, but still were grounded enough in reality that they were intense and realistic. This one just made me drop my suspension of disbelief with football stadiums being blown up and nukes and such. In fairness, however, it still kept the spirit of the other films intact and wasn't a major insult or anything, more just a disappointing letdown. But a lot of the good parts are still there, like the writing, acting, and so on. '' '' (2002) This one's a little trickier, as it's more of a low "okay" than bad, at least in my eyes. It's decently scary and has some good acting, but I too criticize the aliens in this movie for being weak to water, yet attacking a planet 75% covered by it. The twists are not too great (sad considering this is an M. Night Shamalan film), and it just doesn't have anything that interesting or that memorable about it other than a few scary scenes and the message, which is interesting, but nothing to write home about. I saw it once and wasn't offended or anything by it, I just saw it as a mediocre movie that I probably wouldn't see again. '' '' (1985) The best way to describe this movie, at least for me, is annoying. Do you like kids screaming in indistinguishable panicked gibberish? Do you like that screaming to go on for nearly two hours? Then The Goonies is the film for you... but certainly not for me. I already don't like annoying kid characters, but this movie is nothing but annoying kid characters. Watching this movie has all the charm of siting in a Chuck E. Cheese playground: nothing but noisy, loud, screaming kids trying and failing to be charming. That being said though, other than it being annoying, there's nothing too bad in this. There's nothing insulting or offensive, I just can't get past the screaming kids. '' '' (1990) This one is a little bit more akin to something like Signs, but I can say do legitimately dislike it as opposed to just a "low okay". This movie is dumb. And not the fun kind of dumb; the uncomfortable, creepy, and unpleasant kind of dumb. I think the creators were trying to create something unique and surreal, and while they succeeded, the surrealness is more unpleasant than interesting. The story was hard to follow, it was pretty boring, and it didn't seem to know whether it was a science fiction action movie, a surreal political thriller, a strange erotica film, or some sort of artistic experiment. I'll give it credit that it is unique and I've never seen anything quite like it, but I didn't really want to. Again, nothing offensive or insulting, just too weird for my tastes. '' '' (2011) This movie mainly suffers from the main problem Tinker Bell had: it's so incredibly boring and ultimately forgettable. I remember big, important parts of this movie with no music, no fast pacing, or anything to make it engaging. I actually started falling asleep towards the end of this movie, the at the climax no less. Isn't that supposed to be the most exciting part of your film? That, and the two main characters are nothing great. One is just so generically bland and that's it, and the other one is actually quite unlikable and not at all fun to watch. The villain is so unforgettable and boring, and nothing he did mattered in the slightest. Also, for 2011, the animation is pretty poor and looks like something that would better fit in the early 2000s. And, despite being a musical, I can only remember two songs (probably because they were the only ones that were actually good). That said, though, those two songs are not just good, but really good. That and there are two good characters: the main love interest and the monster itself. I kind of wish it was just about them. '' '' (2016) Did anyone ask for this? Really, was anyone out there really demanding that the Angry Birds franchise be brought to the big screen? Well, they did it, much to my dismay. The saddest part is, I actually think this movie had the potential to be a really clever and creative comedy. But the jokes mostly fall flat, it goes on too long, and it just seems like a pointless, stupid idea to adapt a relatively simple mobile app into a feature film. The birds actually have more personality in the animated series than they do here, and we don't even get anything resembling the game until maybe the last ten minutes. Not to mention the rushed editing, subpar voice acting, and poor soundtrack just trying to exploit popular songs. I will actually give it credit for nice animation and a few jokes that work (like anything with Terrence and a bunch of the stuff with King Leonard Mudbeard). But aside from those, I think The Angry Birds Movie is simply fowl. '' '' (1984) The reason I dislike this one isn't so much the movie's fault (well, kinda), but the genre. I hate sports movies, and this one is no different. I hate sports movies because they're all so predictable: an underdog athlete must prove themselves to the world, their lovers, and their family that they are great by winning their sport and defeating the inevitably villainous opposition. This one fits the sports movie mold almost perfectly; just a loser underdog proving himself by defeating an evil villain in a sport. It's intentions are good, and I can't say it does anything wrong, I just don't like sports movies. Mr. Miaggi is great, but even then he's really just the kind old mentor. Again, the movie's not doing anything wrong per say, I just think it's predictable and boring like all sports movies are. '' '' (2013) The first thought you probably have is right: I mainly dislike this movie for what they did to the Mandarin. What is this? Seriously, what did they do to one of the most famous and deadly Iron Man villains?! It's beyond a slap in the face to the character, it's kicking the character in the balls before throwing him off a cliff. It was a terrible decision that brought the whole movie down. Other than that, however, I also felt this Iron Man movie was missing a crucial thing: Iron Man. Most of the movie is Tony Stark, stripped of his armor, being a kind of pathetic, stressed out punk. Even when there is action, it's just shooting guns. That's not what I want to see in an Iron Man movie, I want to see Iron Man! Throw in a kind of forgettable villain and you have a movie that, while not awful, is one of the lesser Marvel movies for me. Category:Blog posts